Kimber's Navy Family

I just wrote a blog post on how to support yourself through deployment ( "Supporting yourself during deployment" ) and how to support the military spouses in your life through deployment ( "Supporting military spouses through deployment" ), so the next post in this series should naturally be about how to support your children through a deployment. Nearing the end of our second sea tour, I can say that going through deployment with an infant and going through a deployment with a 3rd grader are vastly different, just as going through deployment with one child compared to multiple children has also been very different. So my disclaimer for this post is that this is a general guide for getting through deployment with kids. I would love to hear about how you get your children through deployment at their ages and stages! My oldest, as I write this post, is 9-years old in 3rd grade. We also have twin 6-year olds, a 3-year old, and a 1-year old. 1. Familiar routines Th...

I recently posted my top 10 ways to help a military spouse through deployment in my blog post " Supporting military spouses through deployment. " It can be really hard to know exactly what to do to help a friend or neighbor or whoever the military spouse in your life is when they are navigating the deployment of their spouse. But how can you, as the military spouse, help yourself through a deployment? Help comes in various ways and sometimes the help you need is abundant and everywhere you look and sometimes you can't catch a break and feel completely on your own. So what are things that you can do to make your life just a liiiiitle bit easier? 1. Deployment pre-planning To quote Monty Python, "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition." Before deployment, before you are navigating the emergency situation on your own, make a list of every phone number you could possibly need. It sounds ludicrous, but when you start making this list and you struggle through th...

Recently on one of my submarine spouse groups, a spouse asked what kind of support is given to the military families while the service member is deployed. Several people answered, but here's the bottom line: no support is guaranteed. Your boat might not have an active FRG (Family Readiness Group). Or Wardroom (for officer spouses). Or you might be geo-bacheloring and nowhere near any of the military support. Or maybe you haven't connected at that particular duty station or you just moved there or you live across country from all of your friends and family or maybe you are going through a hard time: mentally or physically. But here is the great news! Support for military families can come from anywhere: your neighbors, the military community, your friends and family, your existing support networks and social circles, your church, your gym, your kids' schools, long distance, your FRG, your Wardroom, your military base and the programs offered there. Even better, ...

One hundred and forty-four days. When I say it aloud, it feels like a lot. And a short amount of time, because I know it should have been longer. It should have been longer because my husband had to stay behind and finish a school for the Navy, PNEO (Prospective Nuclear Engineering Officer). The timing of his class meant he had to stay behind and finish PNEO for a couple extra weeks after his crew had already left. Those were weeks of bliss. I'm sure for him it was challenging-- PNEO is a lot of studying. But, from my perspective, the PNEO schedule was much better than the boat schedule. He would study in the morning, come home for lunch, study in the afternoon, and come home shortly after I picked the children up from school. It felt like I actually got to spend time with my husband. It was the perfect way to spend our last couple weeks before deployment. Because, in the blink of an eye, our lazy mornings in bed together were gone. Our family evenings together were gone. O...

April is Month of the Military Child which has made me think a lot about our 5 military children. Our oldest son-- 8 years old and in 2nd grade-- has attended 4 different schools: 2 public schools across the country from each other (kindergarten in Washington DC and 1st and 2nd in Washington state), plus homeschooling kindergarten in South Carolina and preschool in North Carolina. He has lived in 6 different states and 8 different houses. This is his second time having his dad on a sea tour (though he was 2 years old when we got off our first boat). For our other 4 children, this is their first time having their dad on a sea tour, though not the first time they have been separated from him. However, we were able to video chat and call him on our previous separations. Our 6-year old twins have lived in 4 states and 5 houses. So far they have done school "normally," 2 schools, both in the same state. One was preschool and they have now moved on to the elementary...

My first trip to labor and delivery for contractions was at 27 weeks. Each week after that I've had to take it easier and easier. I haven't been able to drive the children anywhere or take them out of the house by myself for almost a month. Now we've had preterm labor and steroid shots for baby #5. I've been on modified bed rest for a couple weeks. My OB has told me to keep taking it easy and do the minimum and I'm supposed to lay down and drink as much water as possible each day. My other favorite part of the instruction, "If you have someone to help with the children, you should use them." It sounds easy enough on paper, but our day to day life is not conducive to bed rest. My husband is on submarines and we have 4 boys: a 7-year old, 5-year old twins, and a 1.5-year old. Managing our house (with minimal assistance) and 4 young children while being on modified bed rest has been challenging. So here are my tips on surviving bed rest with 4 children:...