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Making plans?

What did moms do before texting and Facebook? I don't know how other people make plans or get places on time, but here is how making plans with girlfriends usually goes for me.


Facebook messages the night before:

Me: "Want to meet up tomorrow? I really need to get out of the house and was thinking about mall walking and getting lunch."

My friend Lily: "Sounds good to me. Which mall do you want to meet at? Does 11:00 work for you?"

Me: "Yes. How about the mall with the good play area?"

Lily: "See you there!"


Text messages the morning of:

Lily: "One of my girls is still sleeping. We may be a few minutes late."

Me: "The boys are being wild. Do you want to meet at the closer mall instead?"

Lily: "Sure. They have cheap fountain drinks there."

Me: "And a Starbucks."


Text messages sent at 11:00 am, when we were originally supposed to meet up:

Me: "Okay, just loaded up the boys. On our way."

Lily: "Finding shoes..."


Text message at 11:30 am:

Me: "Just walked into the mall. Text me when you get here."


Text messages at 11:45 am:

Lily: "Just walked into Macy's. Where are you?"

Me: "D dumped a lemonade. Downstairs bathroom by Pottery Barn."


I don't know how normal this is for other mommas; this is normal for me and my friends. The other morning I had all the boys ready to go-- on time, if you can believe that-- only to discover that D spilled milk all the way down the hallway. Or you go to load up and discover stinky diapers. Or all the sippy cups are either dirty or missing. Or your husband leaves later than usual and the whole schedule is thrown off. Or my one-year olds cry all the way through breakfast-- I don't know why-- so I lay them down for a morning nap while I get ready.

I wrote a blog in March called, "Of children and plans." Sometimes-- okay, most of the time-- things don't play out as I had "planned" when the boys are involved. Today I met up with a friend of mine for a quick lunch. Quick lunch turned into talking loudly over a very crotchety baby and leaving early. By the time I got to the car, I was holding a crying, wiggling 15-month old and pushing the stroller with his wailing twin. My three-year old, strangely enough, had his listening ears on, though I did accidentally run his foot over with the stroller (sorry, D man), so he had big tears in his eyes. "I'm okay, Momma," said with a quivery voice.

And that's okay. It is important to me to make friends with people who understand what I am going through. Not all of my friends have kids. One of my good friends-- no kids-- understands my "timing issues," as I call them. (She just happened to know me pre-baby and understands that I've always had timing issues.) Good friends understand when you run late because good friends know you are doing your best to get there on time.

But a playdate is much more fun if your little guy gets 20 more minutes of nap and no one will be happy if you show up with a one-year old with an overflowing, stinky diaper. Life happens.

"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one."
John Lennon
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