Skip to main content

Revolution #9



What a week we've had!

My grandmother stayed with us for the past 8 weeks and she went home this past weekend. I'm sure this is contributing to the boys' mood the past couple days. And mine. And our dog's (she brought her small dog with us, our dog's sister, and they love playing with each other). We all miss Granny!

Despite missing Granny, the boys are driving me nuts. We've had so much whining and fighting and arguing. They've started arguing with each other-- all three of them-- like in movies:

"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"
"Yes!"
"No!"

Um, imagine listening to that for twenty minutes straight. Every half hour. For three days. I feel like as soon as I split up a fight, another one is starting, or the boy I just sent away wanders over to pick a fight with a different brother.

Today I stood in line for coffee with the two toddlers. By the time I got up to the register, both of the toddlers were hanging on my ankles whining non-stop.

"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......"
"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......"

I tried being upbeat with them, "Momma, doesn't know what that means! Use your words!"

To which I would get this response:

"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......"
"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......"

The young woman in line behind me tried commiserating with me, "Oh, man, this line really is taking forever, isn't it?"

But I wasn't in the mood. She was holding an iPhone and a recently purchased book. She was waiting to get her coffee so she could hole up in a corner of the book store and read for the next 8 hours. I was waiting in line to get a drink so that I could make it through storytime without losing my marbles. (I briefly considered asking her if she would like to switch places with me for the next, oh, forty minutes or so...)

Our five-year old is picking fights with the toddlers. Our toddlers are picking fights with our five-year old. The toddlers are picking fights with each other. All three boys are picking fights with me. And then I'm picking fights with my husband.

Why can't we all just get along?

Last night my husband and I had a good talk while we made dinner. We sent all the boys to the playroom, repeatedly. Then two of them to time out. Then all of them to sit on their bed until dinner was ready. (Apparently no one wore their listening ears yesterday.) My husband and I discussed with each other what was working and what wasn't working around the house. We discussed what needs our five-year old had that weren't being met. We discussed the needs of both our two-year olds. We discussed our own needs and how we each would like the day to go. We came up with a new discipline plan that we both could agree on.

Then we called the boys out for dinner-- only two of them actually ate. Then we took a family walk after dinner, where our five-year old kept riding his bike way too far ahead of us, one of our toddlers refused to use his legs and screamed at the top of his lungs half the way back home, and the other toddler walked painfully slow behind all of us. When we finally (finally, finally, finally) got back home, my husband got the boys ready for bed while I splashed water on my face before we put the boys down for an early bedtime. Best of all, my husband and I spent the rest of the evening laughing and making jokes while we put a decent dent in our Halloween candy and watched DVR'd shows in peace. :)

Sometimes that's what you need, a restart, an acknowledgment that things are going in the wrong direction. Sometimes routines and schedules that have worked in the past suddenly stop working and it starts rubbing everybody the wrong way. Right now we are at that awkward point of figuring out what needs to change. My husband took our five-year old bowling this afternoon while I took our toddlers to storytime. When we told our five-year old what his plans were today, he immediately perked up and became Mr. Helpful around the house, cheerily greeting us when we got home from storytime, "Can I help you unload the van, Momma? Daddy and I have lunch ready for you!" We are still working out the kinks, but we are moving in the right direction.

And I would like to add a huge THANK YOU to my husband who always keeps me laughing.
Labels:

Comments

Chelsea Phelps said…
Thanks for commenting on my blog so that I could find yours! Love that you have identical twin boys and an older one to watch out for them, and love that you're a fellow Navy wife! Excited to follow you!

XOXO
Chelsea
http://www.anchorsaweighblog.com
October 30, 2013 2:08 PM
Kimber said…
Thanks for coming by my blog! I recently found yours and have enjoyed reading your posts! :)
October 31, 2013 11:58 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Military spouses

I started this blog before my twins were a year old, 7 years ago. We were a growing military family. We had PCS'd together 3 times by then. I felt like when I talked to other parents of multiples that there was a marked difference in our family mentality. They all had a long view-- neighborhoods they planned on living in for their children's entire childhoods, or sending their kids to schools that they themselves had gone to or all their previous children had gone to. As a military family, our focus is much more on the present. The time we have together today. Where we are living right now. My husband's schedule that week. We have to approach our plans with an open hand. Because I have found that I make plans and hold on to them with a tight fist and, like sand, they slip through my fingers. The military is always changing the game on us. Our orders were revoked before we moved to this duty station. Granted, they came through a week or so later, but at that point in time ...
2 comments
Read more

I love my stroller

Napping while we are out. North Carolina September 2011 I get stopped all the time when I go out. I don't mind that people want to wave at my babies or ask D if he is a "big help" or throw their hands up in mock distress and say, "I don't know how you do it." Sometimes, yes, I would rather run in and out of a store, but, honestly, even if people weren't stopping me, would that really happen heading out with three kids? I've gotten used to the "you have your hands full" conversations, but one thing I never tire of talking about is my stroller. People stop me all the time to comment on my stroller, either to tell me that they wish they had that stroller back when their kids were young or to find out what it is and where to get it. Let me start at the beginning. When D was an infant we had two different Chicco strollers, the travel system and the Chicco $40 umbrella stroller. Neither was that exceptional, but they both served their p...
74 comments
Read more

Supporting yourself during deployment

I recently posted my top 10 ways to help a military spouse through deployment in my blog post " Supporting military spouses through deployment. " It can be really hard to know exactly what to do to help a friend or neighbor or whoever the military spouse in your life is when they are navigating the deployment of their spouse. But how can you, as the military spouse, help yourself through a deployment? Help comes in various ways and sometimes the help you need is abundant and everywhere you look and sometimes you can't catch a break and feel completely on your own. So what are things that you can do to make your life just a liiiiitle bit easier? 1. Deployment pre-planning To quote Monty Python, "No one expects the Spanish Inquisition." Before deployment, before you are navigating the emergency situation on your own, make a list of every phone number you could possibly need. It sounds ludicrous, but when you start making this list and you struggle through th...
1 comment
Read more